If you search
you'll never find
a love like

my love

Aint no feeling like being free
When your mind's made up
And your heart's in the right place
Aint no feeling like being free
When youve done all you could
But whats misunderstood

I'm through with it
I'm finally giving it up
I've given so much in the past
for a love I never had

Its so funny that it makes me cry.
I want you to see
but you dont want to see.
I cant reach you. and it hurts

You tell me you love me, but
...I think you really believe that you do.

You dont give when it matters.
Im so frustrated.
The funny thing is... you dont see it

or you don't care

*sigh*

I continue to change.
to amaze and question myself.
sometimes I'm sad
I question me.
me.

I uploaded pictures on my computer and decided that they are too old to share without going too far in the past...

*sigh*

Will take new pictures and keep up with the times.

Oh I am so ashamed. What a horrible blogger I am.
Sigh...

I think I'll make it up to you by actuall loading and posting some pictures...
How about that?

Good!

I wonder if it will ever leave my mind
I try to see both sides and be glad that it worked out

but...

I can't help but be disappointed.
To wonder what would have happened if I didn't go
Would there be no more?

I fought...I'm glad I did...
Every girl hopes that he would fight for her
Maybe I should just be satisfied.

My birthday is next tuesday...not really excited

I'm so sad.

I wonder if I want things to work too bad.
Maybe I should just look at all the clues.

Oh it hurts.
I'm so sad.

I have to be away from home so that home feels so good!

Happy Halloween! (It is halloween right? hmmm...)

There is a reason why I blog less and less...
I get lost in my own thoughts...
hmmm...

why must we argue over the same things just to make up and go back again.

Can't get it right when no one thinks they are wrong.

I'm wondering if my sense of well-being depends on communication with my self. I seem to have left this step out of my life. I don't seem to have time for the important things anymore. The things that keep me grounded and happy.

I don't make time...
confusion keeps me in limbo.

So almost halfway through semester.

Volleyball
Peer counselor (job..yayyy!)
Business Ambassador
Grades (have potential)

Hmm...I guess I'm doing better than I thought

Why am I so real?
But they don't understand me
I really don't know the truth

I lack the motivation for expression.

I don't think my heart is into blogging anymore. I think I might stop

:-(

My heart...poor thing

sometimes the smallest things are also the sweetest things :D

Hmmm...goood day!!

Jason's Deli
Lunch with Foley's chairperson
90 on French quiz
egg rolls
fun with Toya!!!

Yayy!

rain = good
getting caught in the rain = bad

You're the air that I breathe
The perfect one for me

but...

My friend talking about his wife... "I have a 19 year old kid.'

Baby boy you stay on my mind

You know that I'm just the kind of girl that feels so hurt and smiles

Now you
Saying I complete your dreams
Now you saying
I'm your everything

***********

Even though there's another man in my life
You will always be my boo

So I've found my passion...
wow...scarey stuff.

So maybe I do want it.
Or at least I think I do.
Yeah I know I want it.
But do I want it now?
Do I need it now?

*sigh*

I'm not too bad of a slacker...I'm just not feeling the love for my computer at the moment. :(

I don't use excuses
Don't ask why
It's just a breakdown
It happens all the time

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.

I am lost.

Just waiting to be found...

Well now I've seen Jesse and Claudia. Two more..there's April and ummm oops I think I forgot. It'll come back to me soon. Who says that UT is such a big campus. Who would have thought.

Yayyyy good to see you two!!! Hope you have a great first year...

Okay
Back to studying *sigh*

Hmmm... I'm in love...

I was in love yesturday.and the day before.it has been some time now.

Hmmm...I'm in love...

Well I did get something done last night. :) So very proud of my kinda sorta productive self. yayy for Alexis.


**************


Well... do you think ordering school supplies off of the internet is nerdy???
yeah yeah...kinda figured

I feel like a little kid trying to play grownup.

Slacker blogger that I am...

God please help me have a peace of mind.

Back to school once again...yayyy!

I want.
I'm scared to have.
and then lose.

I'm angry and sad.
Emotions take away from the energy to act.

But when I'm happy...
I see rainbows...wonderous miracles.

Happy Birthday Momma!
Happy Birthday Daddy!

I love you!

So I'm in Austin and I've settled in
*sigh*

Now I need a system....

I have too much time on my hands...
hmmm...
I need a passion...along with a job.

volunteer tutor.business ambassador.intramural volleyball.[insert passion here].[insert job here]. *sigh*

I'm back in Austin!! I feel a deep feeling of satisfaction. I'm okay, not bleeding...

All good.

Now...to venture out of my safetly zone...

Goals for this week:

1. Actively look for a Job
2. Accept Texas Exes Invitation
3. Go to UT and see what is going on...plan to go to go to 3 events.

Safety is so nice...but it's too easy.

My emotions are so thick in my head.
I can't pick them out to write.
So tangled.
No energy to untangle.

It's like being caught in a spider's web.
The more I wrangle to be free.
I tangle even more.

Happy Birthday Tosh!

What a lazy day...
speeches speeches

Rose makes me feel better.

I'm scared about going back to Austin too...in fact I'm petrified!

I'm so sad...my heart hurts :-(

I'm not perfect. I'm not sure if I try to be. I don't do I?

Logical. That's what I try to be. But logic runs into truth sometimes (or so it seems)

I don't know what's going on anymore. I don't know my own truth.

Sometimes it's the last person that makes you first

When I saw the break of day
I wished that I could fly away
Instead of kneeling in the sand
Catching teardrops in my hand

My heart is drenched in wine
But you'll be on my mind
Forever

Sometimes a stranger can be your best friend

Michael and Mykia are here :D

I don't like people who complain and complain and never do anything about it.

I tell people this...Don't ask for my advice if you're not going to even consider what I have to say.


So...
Alexis...
Do something!

So if you never come to me
You'll stay a distant memory
Out my window I see light doing dark
Your dark eyes don't haunt me

Speech day...went well!

Oh what I would give to have a clear state of mind.

I'm so tired...

Love is union with somebody, or something, outside oneself,
under the condition of retaining the separateness and integrity of one's own self.
-Erich Fromm

We don't love qualities, we love persons;
sometimes by reason of their defects as well as
of their qualities.
-Jacques Jacques Maritain

My body feels when something is wrong.
Something is wrong.
It frustrates me when something is always wrong.
Talk to me. Help me fix it.

Not knowing sucks :-(

Birthday is coming up...
I'm excited... it's not mine.

I hope you like it...
The day, not the gift--
although I hope you like that too.

The gift is special too.
...Birthday surprises :D

timing is everything...

Every time I want to let go and be myself again.
A turtle ready to stick its head out.

This happens.
I duck my head back into safety.

Safety isn't safe anymore. What to do now.

A brick wall.
Just won't move.
uhhhh.

ooohhh lala..the days go by

*sigh* I wish I had a swing in my backyard
so I could feel the wind...and maybe believe like I once did
that one day I would reach the sky.

*smile*

There they go running!!!! I don't think these girls live on my street.

Ha! The funniest thing! These girls from down the street were ringing our doorbell and running off. But that's not the funny part; they didn't care if we saw them and took pictures. They just seemed to liked our doorbell! Hehehe to be that young again :D

How the days do fly...

*sigh* Off work...got nothing done.

Bad Alexis

For some reason I'm amazingly happy...

I think it's you.

Sagittarius & Leo
The Fire signs Leo and Sagittarius pursue the same goals, and can succeed in allying their strengths instead of competing. Optimistic, generous, and romantic, they understand and love each other with both passion and tenderness. They indulge in life's pleasures to the fullest, laughing unabashedly and egging each other on. Sagittarian criticism may sometimes hurt the Leo's feelings, but forgiveness will soon be forthcoming. The Lion is aware of his sacred complicity with the Centaur-Archer. Together, they reach the heights of bliss.

Beaumont was great...I got to see a piece of you.

Gumbo.Bootleg movies.Daycare kids.Bike Rides.Picture Booths.Dippin Dots.Logan's.Friends. Family.Disney Cartoons.Me.You.*Smile*

I leave today...hmmm...  *smile*

I think today was...interesting

comfortable.      bad thoughts...none
where? Don't care. why? why not?
no wondering

trust. no. not yet. one step closer

friends. great. call you tomorrow. love you

I don't know what to think anymore...

English is almost over.  yessss!

I need sleep...

Once or twice a day...
That's pretty often.

It makes me wonder
why I try
why I hope

Why I don't just give up.

Moved in...hmmm.. what a work out *phew*

I don't know what's wrong with me...
I'm tired...that's what it is...I think

*sigh* I know it's not

Said my How-to-Speech today... It went well, I wish I would have been a little more prepared because I felt like I could have given more information in the same amount of time.  Oh well, I'll do better on the next one. 

I really don't know why I'm so motivated to do well on these speeches.  Maybe it's the atmosphere.  Who knows...

I am young
I am free
But I get tired and I get weak
I get lost and I can't sleep
But suddenly....

I miss you, miss you so bad
I don't forget you, oh it's so sad
I hope you can hear me
I remember it clearly 

                                

                 * * * * 

It's better when I don't think about the past...
Sometimes, you just have to accept it.
Doesn't make it less than what it was...
Just makes it gone.

What's your perception of love
Now, how many times did we say it was over
And how many times did we not leave
There's no sense in this love hangover 
            

              * * * *

Sometimes my eyes won't close from weepin'

Wondering where you been
I can't cope with this

Some things never change...so I'm going to bed  :-(

So it seems that I will be making a trip to Beaumont.  Hmmm... how interesting...how fun...how exciting.  Can't wait!!! 

"Society everywhere is in conspiracy against the manhood of every one of its members. Society is a joint-stock company, in which the members agree, for the better securing of his bread to each shareholder, to surrender the liberty and culture of the eater. " -Ralph Waldo Emerson from "Self-Reliance"

I love my brother,
he can't sing!
 
But he is so adorable.

I still remember our first kiss
I'm nervous and tremblin'

"Nothing at last is sacred but the integrity of your own mind."  - Ralph Waldo Emerson, from Self-Reliance

I feel like nothing is ever going to go my way.
Why get my hopes up that things will work out?
Why try your hardest and hope that people will notice
Why care?

Oh my gosh I can't empty my mind of thoughts.
Good thoughts. Bad thoughts. Thoughts...
*sigh*
 
On another note, I think I have a stalker :-(
 
Oh and an old lady on oxygen cursed me out at work today.  That was interesting.
I wasn't even mad, I just couldn't believe the situation.  *hehe*
Maybe I shouldn't laugh :-(
But it was really funny.

Quizzes are funny because they never have the answers that I would want to choose...hmmm...
My search is on for the perfect quiz...
 
But for now here is this one, although I'm not too sure if it is me.  How do you sum someone like me up in one word?  You can't so why try? 
 
Your soul is WILLFUL. You are determined and a
little reckless, and you do whatever you want
to do. You have strong opinions and are not
easily swayed, and your headstrong resolve is
not easily countered. You have few regrets.
People find your refusal to go down without a
fight formidable, and they respect you for it.
You are a proud and content soul.

What Is Your Soul's Trait?
brought to you by

I see the etch of your face
And it makes it hard for me to breathe

Great green gobs of greasy grimey gopher guts,
Mutiliated monkey meat,
Chopped up birdie feet!
 
French fried eyeballs mixed in with baby mush,
I for-got my spoon!
 
 
 
Does anybody else remember this besides me?

I don't think that conversation went like I planned. 
I was only trying to help.
 
Tryinig to help always gets me in trouble, I should know and accept this.
 
*sigh*  I'll patch it up tomorrow.  Poor baby...

I wonder...
If life wasn't so confusing,
would I still have fun? 

                                          * * *

I said my dream speech yesturday, and it was so fun.  At first I thought I didn't have any dreams cause I didn't know what I wanted to be in life :-(  But then I realized that I did have a dream although it isn't specific in the career area.  When I was pretending in class that all my dreams came true, I felt so happy.  My dreams aren't out there in lala land.  They can come true.  Dreams are wonderful.  It felt great just thinking of them and sharing.  Oh fun fun, happy happy :-}

I love you

Why do we fight
I'm tired
I can't fight anymore

I'm sorry for not being myself
I wish away the doubts
I do love you
 
I miss you
But I just still don't know

Doctors appointment...good.

For once.

I'm so frustrated.

It's too much. I'm tired of trying to please everybody, because nobody is ever happy and I work my butt off and come up empty.

That is just not fair!

Finally...I'm wondering what took so long.

A hundred days had made me older since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lights had made me colder and I don’t think I can look at this the same
But all the miles had separate
They disappeared now when I’m dreaming of your face

I’m here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight it’s only you and me

The miles just keep rolling as the people either way to say hello
I hear this life is overrated but I hope it gets better as we go

And tonight girl it’s only you and me

Everything I know, and anywhere I go
it gets hard but it won’t take away my love
And when the last one falls, when it’s all said and done
it get hard but it won’t take away my love

"Here without you" 3 Doors Down

I hope you mean it...

With you I get so high
Lost in the crystal sky

I'm still wondering what the whole promise thing means...
Should I ask Tosh for the 100th time?

Maybe I just like hearing it...just a thought!

I want to show pictures of the promise ring that Tosh gave me, but there's two problems.

1. My dad keeps taking my laptop to work so he can watch movies on it.

2. It's really hard to take a good picture of big beautiful diamonds. :P

How can I be so happy,
then question my happiness.

How can I want something so bad,
then think maybe I don't need it at all.

How can I be so excited,
yet so scared.

I want to plunge in head first.
The bay on a spring afternoon.
But after the first splash,
I face the aftermath of the ripples...
then I realize that the beautiful bay
is still freezing cold from the winter.

Rose reminds me of what a slacker I am when it comes to my blog. *sigh* who cares...

I'm so tired of summer school! Next session...okay let's not think about it. Let's pretend that it's not coming and...ahhh man I can't seem to disapear in my own little world. What's going on?

The end to a great weekend..

It was a wonderful weekend,
I had it all at the same time.
(How often does that happen?)

The weather was beautiful,
My family was great...
and then, there was Tosh.

When thinking of the weekend
as a whole, the mishap
barely leaves a dent.

Although my mind hasn't been so lucky.

My eyes are open! Yeesss! Aren't we just so cute... *sigh*

Oops just couldn't keep my eyes open!

Everyone one loves the beach...yayyy!

Don't they look so cute playing on the Port Aransas Beach??

Corpus Beaches are BEAUTIFUL! How easy I forget. I think I'm just a spoiled little girl. I'm oh so sorry.

Tosh is here! Went to the beach...oh I have some great pictures with some stories to tell.

45 minute ferry wait
20 minutes to find a park

All to see Joel and Tosh fight with the baby waves!

:) *sigh*

Now it's hardly simple
It's just simply hard,
when it comes to you

I'm by myself
Not being myself
Just to avoid all this confrontation

"But dost thou love life, then do not squander time, for that's the stuff life is made of."

Analogy of early hand over to Iraq made by my government teacher:

"Surprise! Here's the key to the brand new car but you can't drive it...or you can drive around the block but you can't go anywhere else...or think of it as a learner's permit!"

The Monroe Doctrine explained by my government teacher:

"This is our pie, you have your pie. We won't take a piece of your pie and you can't take a piece of ours. If you try to take a piece of our pie, we will slap."

"If a man is happy in his work, exerting himself to the full extent of his capabilities, and enjoying it, I'd say he's a success."

-William Romain

The definition of success is misinterpreted by many.

"Success is determined by how determined you are to succeed."

-Geofrey R. Lorenz

Another definition of success, which I've come to thnk is my favorite word. :0

I'm so excited about this weekend. I just want to see, touch, and yeah yeah taste the happiness. Just four more days. I don't think I could be anymore excited. Maybe I'll just see about tomorrow haha...

Tuuuuuusssssssssshhhyyyy!!! I have no shame what so ever!!! *smile*

" Let Greeks be Greeks, and women what they are."

-Anne Bradstreet

I love being a woman. It's just so chic!

You know it always takes someone else's troubles to make you realize how good you have it. I'm grateful for God's love.

"It's just a job. Grass, grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up."

- Muhammad Ali

Hahaha... don't you wish you had the guts to say that? I wish I could say something like that AND back it up. I love people sometimes.

I love it at Halliburton... the people are so nice, the atmosphere is so friendly. Oh so small and cozy!!

There's something about getting things accomplished that puts a little pep in my step,

a smirk on my face,

and some milk in my shake :)

"I'm not confused. I'm just well Mixed."

-Robert Frost

I feel so motivated, I feel like... myself. What is the meaning of this?

I'm tired...

I was leaving class and I saw the most wonderful thing!!
A rainbow!! It really made my day. It's been so long since I've seen one. It was so beautiful.

I just stood their and watched in the sprinkles of the rain... *sigh*

I'm not a perfect person
As many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear

The Reason by Hoobastank
(I'm glad you wanted me to hear it)

Cohort 2!!! You guys were so great!!! :-}

This past week has been so crazy. I've met so many people who made me happy to be me. I love me. I also love cohort 2!!! Yaayyy Second place in the marketing competition. I really missed Austin and I think Austin missed me. I could tell. So much love in one week. I really needed that. It was soooo good to see Jen, Alex, and Rose. I've made alot of crazy decisions but being in Austin, I realized that they were all the right ones. What a way to go Alexis!!!

The bootylicious award??? Guys I really do love you, but it's not that big.

The last night...aww I missed Adam. Adam you were my ace...even though you called me a buick. And Quincy thank you for explaining to me why you think everyone always talk about my butt. Kelly you were right and all that matters is that you got it done and it was fantastic!!! Go Kelly! Phil was the best, I hope I didn't ruin your life, lol. Whitney, Alex, Charlie, Sophie, Claudia, Tara, and April... I've got so much love for you guys!

I still love you, I'm just tired. So I'll wait instead...

Some people take on the wrong roles. Some people cannot be the head of big projects.
Sometimes you just can't win. But that's life. Life sucks sometimes...but then there are the beautiful things.

I love the beautiful things.

Good Communication is as stimulating as black coffee,
and just as hard to sleep after.

I used to know exactly what I wanted.

Who I wanted, what I wanted...
I knew what I wanted.

I knew where I wanted to go.
What's next? I knew.

Now I don't.
I feel lost.
I reach out for some kind of help, cause now it's like I finally need it...but then I come up empty. And it amazes me, even astounds me. Then it makes me angry. What are friends for anyway. What the hell is going on. But then...

I feel sad. Cause I'm right back not knowing.

What I like about Government is that my professor makes me want to learn, meakes me want to watch the news, and makes me excited. How can you be excited about government? Take Heather Hallock!

We both need to grow up.

Life is so confusing.
Sometimes...

I don't want to figure it out.

I want to give up...and float.

Confusion. I don't care.
Confusion.Anger.Bewilderment.Anger.Nonchalance.Relief.Happiness.

I could go on and on but sometimes I wonder why go through the cycle. Why not just pick one and stick to it for the rest of your life. But then who would get to decide which one everyone gets stuck with.

I would pick happiness--who wouldn't.

Maybe serendipity brought you here to meet me to you

When somebody loves you
It's no good unless he loves you - all the way

When somebody needs you
It's no good unless he needs you - all the way

Who knows where the road will lead us
Only a fool would say

But if you'll let me love you
It's for sure I'm gonna love you - all the way, all the way

Interesting note:

Past: Germany (evil empire) never attacked us; Japan attacked us, yet, we landed in Normandy that fateful day.

Present: Iraq/Sudam never attacked us, Osama Bin Ladin attacked us.

So... same difference? hmmm....something to think about

George W Bush...some speakers are born and some are made and he is...neither one.

--Said very eloquently by my Government teacher

I'm feeling really adventurous... I think I'm about to have some fun!!!

:)

I love the sound of rain outside of my window.

The perfect time to curl up in a good book

or

daydream about wonderful words said,
people who touch my heart,
and beautiful things such as grins and curly hair.

I think that it's the rain that's got me so mushy.
Or maybe I just feel good.

Oh My Gosh!!!

:) Technology is wonderful :)

I have a headache :(

Cheer up. It's an art to cheer up others. Thank you.

Who the hell do you think you are?
You have no right...I'm so upset!
But the worst part is

I don't have anyone to talk to about it.

It's funny cause there are three people I can talk to about anything.

One...
I don't know if that's true, something is blocking it, I don't know

Two...
I feel far away from, but I could talk, they'd be open, even down the street, just can't talk

Three...
Frustrating the hell out of me! The reason why I'm angry, I'm wishing for distance again, and then fear came from somewhere

Best friends...friends...whatever...I have no one to talk to.

Why? Should I ask?
Do I want to know?
Do you?
Man sometimes I'm just so tired.

I think too much. *sigh*
I can't understand why people just don't read my mind.
Maybe that wouldn't be such a good idea.
But I wish you would say it. Or say something.
That's what I'm thinking.

"I never would have opened up
but you seem so real to me

Don't tell me I haven't been good to you
Don't tell me I have never been there for you
Just tell me why
Nothing is good enough"

I feel a sharp pang of hurt. I try to ignore it.
What else can I do?

I hurt.

To think I didn't think it could get worse.

I hurt.
What can I do? I hurt.

I can only believe...

But why do I still hurt at the thought of it?
Sharp pangs that won't go away.

I've given you the best that I've got.

I love midnight trips.


Wal-Mart
the bay
the beach

(those are never all that healthy
but lessons are learned
and I'm sure that's the important part)

Sonic late night snacks
the pasture
the swing
apartments
the base (shhh that's a secret)


I think I'm just one of those people that come alive at night
It's so exciting...

Some people work things out
and some people just don't know how to change

Tell me why,through it all...
my frustrations, my anger.

I still miss your smile.

:(

You don't ever give in.
It's always your way.
Well this matters to me.

you can't think something is weird
if you don't know what normal is

You meet interesting people
when you least expect it...
*smile* *wink* *giggle* *smile*

It's one in the morning..interview in the morning...long drive...
What the hell is wrong with me. Go to BED!!
I'm so hardheaded and I am not a morning person.

My lip looks better. Hehe...I don't care, it was a good bite. That's what you get when you mess with me. I was serious damnit.

Up.
^
|
|

Down.
|
|
|
hmmm...how to do a down arrow.

Going to bed now...interview..panties...yayyy!

Panties.
More Panties.
And More Panties.

Baby do those things

Me and You...
it dont' get no better.

How easy it was to break the peace.
That scares me.
Sometimes I just want to...

*uhh*

I hate it when I'm so happy and I'm floating on air and I can't wait to share and be happy with others...and then I can't. It sends me crashing down. *sigh* I am sad.

I wish you would talk to me. I miss you. I want to know everything you do during the day. I want to know how you feel. I want you to sing to me. I like the way you sing. I want to hear you tell me something funny. I wish you would talk to me. I miss you.

I write here for you. I write in xanga for her. I don't write in xanga anymore.

Why does it matter? It matters because I didn't know.
Why did she have to be the one to tell me?

...I've never been this swept away.
I can feel the magic floating in the air...

It's funny how the people you've known for years have changed in just one year. It's not really change I guess, but more like...moving on. Everyday, normal isn't the same for everybody anymore.

I have no interest in going back to the relationships I had in high school. I wonder why. I mean these relationships have years under their belt. Maybe because I know it's pointless to hold on to something that's growing away from me, and I'm growing away from them.

I feel sorry for the people that hold on to the past and look to it to be the future.

Some people will never leave here because here never changes. People change, but I guess only if they allow it. Some people haven't realized that staying the same and feeling the same isn't really that fulfilling. But I guess you don't know till you've tried it.

For me, home is safe. I like safe, but I can't help but wonder what else I can conquer. Cause I've already conquered home and the people who live here. I want to conquer my future. That's a little harder, but I guess I like a good challenge.

I am sad.

When we are not on the same page, it hurts.
You fix it better than I do.

No matter what I do, In the back of my mind I think of you.
I wonder what you are doing or what you are thinking.
I wish I could touch you.
*sigh*

I miss your smile. I miss you.

So what do you do?
Two friends...can't have one and have the other
both make life difficult
one has my heart
one makes the connection
safe is an easy feeling
two friends...

Friendship is one heart in two bodies.

I missed my brother, he's goofy.
I brought him slimfast (he likes them)
He unloaded my car
I missed my brother, he's sweet.

Dorm life:
Midnight strolls
Wingzone...zero bevobucks
J2; JCL
The "Q"
Roommates
Bonding
Madden
Movie Night
Drama
Conclusion...Everyone should try it at least once

My room echos

Madden is useful at times. When you're the only one who has to study for tests and your trusty friends play Madden until four in the morning...you are not alone in your late night efforts. Since I don't like Madden I don't get jealous that I don't get to participate in the madness. So yeah, Madden has it's uses.

One down, three to go.

I can dream about tomorrow, even if it's still today.

Studying with a bunch of friends.
Acting out Beyonce in Speechless.
Ordering pizza.
Dividing parts for Ronald Isley's Contagious.
Watching the Lakers game.
Comparing love songs.
Getting free cookies and tea from JCL.
Downloading love songs.
Studying with a bunch of friends...

Soft caress of happiness...
...I wish I didn't get so weak...

I'm not a flirt, I'm just friendly...

I'm a friend first. Remember that.

Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
T. S. Eliot

Conversation is an art in which a man has all mankind for his competitors, for it is that which all are practising every day while they live.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Don't be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Gluttony is not a secret vice.
Orson Welles

A room without books is like a body without a soul.
G. K. Chesterton

Tact is the knack of making a point without making an enemy.
Isaac Newton

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
Carl Jung

I'm bored. What a horrible feeling.

Time is winding down *sigh* *hiccup* *sigh*

I need a nap...

Roses for no reason...
What is a girl to do? *sigh*

I have 4 tests this week and I'm tired. Not tired from studying or homework or stress--although I have every right to be. I'm tired because I've been stretched too much. Emotions are a lot of work. I feel like I've had a tremendous workout and I'm sore all over.

It's funny how the little things really make me happy.
Walkin through campus in my pajamas brings a certain thrill that I just can't describe.

Today is "no trip" day.

Sleep is the best medicine.
The problem is that you have to wake up sometime.
So what do you do when you wake up?
Can't run forever. But you can always try...
Some people never learn. I'm one of them...

So maybe I like the old me better...

He said he loved me

I want to lay and think of nothing. I don't have that luxury. I no longer want to think of recommendations to a class, or that I missed a great opportunity, or that I actually wanted to do it, or that when people ask...I have to say that I slept, or that I failed. I don't want to think. I have to move on with my day and I resent that. I resent everyone right now, especially those closest to me because they will have more to say than I want to hear.

I'm so sad. One Word: bleak
I don't even know the direction to turn, I don't even understand this feeling. I don't know what to do next. My logical mind says to move on. Something inside me urges me to fix it. And me....well...I guess I'm just stunned. I didn't plan this and I don't think I can fix it. Therefore I feel lost. And feeling lost is just another feeling itself. My mind is moving so fast, yet it thinks of nothing. Well, nothing logical that I can touch and feel. I think my mind is still in fix it mode, but it's out of my control. How do you fix things you can not control? You can't...so you don't put yourself in that position...you don' t mess up. I messed up and I have to face the consequences. But my mind is not excepting...I'm not excepting...I'm so sad. bleak.

I want to be looked at with complete love and adoration. But sometimes, I wonder if when it's all said and done will I look back and wonder how i missed it?

Life is change...
Growth is optional...
Choose wisely..
-KAREN KAISER CLARK

So would you come and fly with me?,
Forever you and me,
Thats how its spose to be

If I was your woman
I'd never never, no no
stop loving you

My body is tired and it's trying to tell me; but I don't have time to listen...

You're more than I wanted...everything I never had...

It's hard to be patient

I'd rather have bad times with you than good times with somebody else...

Uh...oh what am I getting into?